to fully complete my transition to hypocritical asshole, i am becoming baptist.
no, not really, however, at work the other day I realized baptists and me have a lot more in common than I thought. See, this is what Baptists believe (courtesy of wikipedia):
- Biblical authority ( Matthew 24:35; 1 Peter 1:23; 2 Timothy 3:16-17)
- Autonomy of the local church ( Matthew 18:15-17; 1 Corinthians 6:1-3)
- Priesthood of all believers (1 Peter 2:5-9; 1 Timothy 5)
- Two ordinances (baptism and the Lord’s Supper) (Acts 2:41-47; 1 Corinthians 11:23-32)
- Individual soul liberty (Romans 14:5-12)
- Separation of Church and State ( Matthew 22:15-22)
- Two offices of the church (pastor and deacon) (I Timothy 3:1-13; Titus 1-2)
Did you catch the S? Wow, who knew? In case you ever get in an argument and want to pull this out of your hat, here’s the Bible verse, the well-known “give unto Caesar:”
Matthew 22:15-22 (New International Version)
Paying Taxes to Caesar
15 Then the Pharisees went out and laid plans to trap him in his words. 16 They sent their disciples to him along with the Herodians. “Teacher,” they said, “we know you are a man of integrity and that you teach the way of God in accordance with the truth. You aren’t swayed by men, because you pay no attention to who they are. 17 Tell us then, what is your opinion? Is it right to pay taxes to Caesar or not?” 18 But Jesus, knowing their evil intent, said, “You hypocrites, why are you trying to trap me? 19 Show me the coin used for paying the tax.” They brought him a denarius, 20 and he asked them, “Whose portrait is this? And whose inscription?” 21 “Caesar’s,” they replied. Then he said to them, “Give to Caesar what is Caesar’s, and to God what is God’s.” 22 When they heard this, they were amazed. So they left him and went away. So Jesus thinks people who want to mix chuch and state are hypocrites? Yay JC! Sadly, they’ve already put god on our money, which probably was a bad plan, from the pov of this verse….
UPDATE some baptist do take this seriously. I love these people!