Dwight Yoakam used to do impressions of Richard Nixon.

*According to wikipedia

Dark Knight encourages clown violence.  Finally, clown violence not related to ICP.

I just paid money for an mp3. Wow. I haven’t ever done that before.  Interesting.

So one of my favorite bands has toured my time zone, to my knowledge, once. I got to see them then, but it was about 7 years ago. And they’re playing tonight. And I cannot tell you how excited I am. For a long, long time they never toured here and no one knew who they were so I stopped even attempting to follow them! You couldn’t get any of their albums here. And I thought that went away with digital, but no. Then their music was used on The Sopranos (the best part of the show, IMO), so everyone I knew kind of scoffed at their music. It’s been a hard road! But there’s not many other bands that sample Jim Jones in their country techno, so it’s not like I could find another outlet.

I can’t even imagine seeing them in a venue this large. But I can only imagine it will be awesome.

I also got to see Devo last week, who I have always wanted to see. Seeing both of these bands I have been waiting years to see in one week is crazy! But exciting.

Take this as your official invitation to come visit the Uncensored Interview Blog, where I will also be blogging, generally about their awesome interview vids, the indie lifestyle, music, etc.  My first post, about Kid Rock (oh, the high quality of my musical interests), is here, but you can generally follow my posts here.  Will be sidebar linked as well for future reference. While you’re there, the videos are really cool.  And they are looking for competitors in their corporate Guitar Hero challenge, so sign up if you think you can take them.

I am uncomfortable with gangsta rappers kicking my ass….at chess.

R. Kelly on love: “You come to appreciate love more when you in love. Just as you like cereal until you come to your favorite kind of cereal and then you can appreciate cereal even more now, you know?”

If you were illiterate and came into a lot of money, wouldn’t you hire a tutor and learn how to read?  Or is that just me?

I wish Andrew WK were my life coach.

By popular demand, I will recount my awesome experience at the Dolly Parton show at Radio City Music Hall.  I went with my friend Jared who had recently gotten back from tour.  In Nashville, Jared graciously picked up some George Jones’ “Good on Everything Sauce.”  On the way to the show Jared picked up some yellow printing ink as well.

Why do you care about these facts?  Because Radio City does not like liquids in bottles.  The security man and I had a little discussion and he was going to take my George Jones sauce until I said, “OH man!  It’s for BBQ!”  The man totally respected this.  He was completely confused by the printing ink, and allowed it as well.

Our seats were technically “obscured view” which apparently means “awesome, balcony center behind the sound board.”  There was no opener.  Dolly was AMAZING.  She played seven instruments.  At one point, I turned to Jared and said, “What’s next, a harp?” only to have Dolly PULL OUT AN AUTOHARP.

Unlike most big stars she played all her big hits, and three songs off the new album (Backwoods Barbie, Better Get to Livin, and Jesus and Gravity).  I most wanted to hear “Why’d You Come in Here Lookin’ Like That” which was the second song she played.  Her voice was amazingly on point the whole night.  Her chattiness between songs was hilarious.  She thanked everyone for spending their hard earned dough on her.

She played “Jolene” and then mentioned that there were a lot of men dressed as Dolly in the audience.  She said she should have sung it as “Drag Queen.”  The audience was probably the most vociferous and excited I have ever seen, and Dolly seemed to agree.  She had a great band too, but sadly the only duet she did was “Islands in the Stream.”  She did “Brother Love’s Travelin’ Salvation Show” too, which I had never heard performed by anyone other than Neil Diamond.

Dolly did comment on how there’s not a whole lot of country music in nyc anymore which struck a chord in me.  From the reading/documentary watching I have been doing, it seems like there was a time when you had to make it in NYC to be a big country/folk singer, and that there was a huge country scene here.  There seems to be a country resurgence here at the moment, but I wonder why there was this big anti-NYC movement in the 70s/80s espoused by Buck Owens (I Wouldn’t Live in NYC (If They Gave Me the Whole Dang Town)) and Hank Jr. (Country Boy Can Survive and If Heaven Ain’t a Lot Like Dixie).  What changed?  Maybe it was Nashville sound or something, but I have to say I know a lot more rabid country music fans here than anywhere else I have lived.

Basically if you get the chance to see her, go do it.  And tell me if the audience is 100% gay men and their moms like it is here.

How was I unaware of the NKOTB reunion?  I consider this both a personal failure on my part and on that of my friends for not mentioning it.  HOW COULD YOU?

I have to say, except for the poor facial hair, Danny is far more attractive than he used to be.  Jordan seems like a poor man’s Matthew Broderick now.

Are not something I generally enjoy together. UNTIL NOW!  My favorites are this and this.

Tufte would be proud.

Do you live in DC, SC, NC, TN, PA, KY, LA, or AR? And do you love to listen to rock music? Or perhaps would you like to meet a Jew? Then perhaps you should go see a show by my friend Jared Friedman. He will be playing in your parts, and, in addition to being a smashing musician, he will let you in on how he controls the media for a dollar.  If you bargain with him.

You can listen to his musical stylings here and tour dates are as follows:

Oddly Mr. Friedman will not play alone here in NYC, so I will not be able to hear the awesomeness you can!

Remember when widget commonly meant a generic product and NOT a small piece of software?  What are econ teachers using now instead?
I also kind of miss when you would play music to death and you could see the physical effects/degredation.  That DK tape with the worn off letters and the snaggly bit near “Holiday in Cambodia.”  While this is silly from a preservation standpoint, I kind of miss seeing the physical effects of loving music so much.  The Smiths section of my hard drive will never outwardly show more wear than the other parts.

I just listened to an old NPR interview with Jens Lekman which pointed out that his “I’m Leaving You Because I Don’t Love You Anymore” is a love song to a girl with an asthma inhaler!

so pick up your asthma inhaler
and put it against your lips
oh, those lips i’ve loved that i was dreaming of
they’re still red and soft
i’m so sorry i couldn’t love you enough
so sorry i couldn’t love you enough

Lyrics here. Previously.

I have frequently lamented that allergies are the one dork thing that will never be cool. But MC Chris is trying, god bless him. He has referred to his inhaler before, and robot dog mentions being allergic to all breeds of dog, but this reference in his new song melted my little dorky heart:

She’s wordy and verbose
Prolific and prone to prose
Always sick and has a cold
Stuffed nose she’s got to blow
I’ve got many cold remedies, many old enemies
I’ve got a girl that kick their ass like River from Serenity

–Nerrrd Grrrl

I think whenever anyone asks you what music you listen to, most people say everything.  The last time someone asked me this and I said everything, he said, “Oh yeah, how about klezmer!”  When I replied that I love accordion music, he had to concede.  I am sure we all think we have more eclectic tastes than we actually do, but today when making some end of the year mix CDs, I had to laugh when the Gaither Vocal Band’s “I Catch ‘Em, God Cleans ‘Em” (a beautiful analogy between fishing and evangelism) smacked up right next to Kid Rock’s “Balls in Your Mouth.” (an equally beautiful sentiment about Kid Rock’s apparent sexual activity of preference). Which artist would be more angry, I wonder?

I felt so bad I moved the Gaithers near a cover of “It Is Well with My Soul” and Kid Rock to a cover of “Too Drunk to Fuck.”  Do other people feel their mix CDs might be a ticket to hell?  Maybe I can move some klezmer next to “Ham Beats All Meats” and offend everyone equally.

The band at the office xmas party ended their set with….”let’s get it on.”

really?  did they think that was an appropriate choice for a work function?  i hope they don’t play family reunions….

As a huge fan of George Michael’s body of work, my favorite Christmas song is probably “Last Christmas” by Wham! Last Christmas (and by that I mean the holiday season of the preceding year) I was excited to find out that “Last Christmas” (the song) has been made in many languages, which I find bizarre and hilarious. Why this song? I was going to work on a mix CD of “Last Christmas” covers for my sister (who also loves it) when I found this website, Last-Christmas.com. Apparently last year they collected as many versions as they could, and it seems like there’s around 200 of them!

it doesn’t look like they are currently downloadable, but it’s an amazing resource with links to most of the artists and lots of awesome videos. And if you think *I* am obsessed, someone RECREATED the original Wham video scene by scene. Insane. It seems to be covered in every genre including metal, reggaeton, and hiphop. HOW DID THAT HAPPEN?

Stolen from Grace. I am VERY jealous that she has seen James Brown. Of the three bands we have in common–I went to two of the shows with her and took her tix to another when she was sick! Otherwise we did not overlap so much.

Copy this list; leave in the bands you’ve seen perform live; delete the ones you haven’t, and add new ones that you have seen until you reach 25. An asterisk means the previous person had it on their list. Two asterisks means the last two people who did this before you had that band on their list.

Dan Bern*
Bitch & Animal*
Maceo Parker*
Stereolab
Prince
Metallica
The Ramones
Cheap Trick
Buck 65
Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons
They Might Be Giants
Velvet Underground
Beck
The Cardigans
Social Distortion
Wilco
Ben Folds
The Drive-By Truckers
The Electric Six
Tom Waits
MC Chris
Robbie Fulks
Weezer
Tenacious D
Jonathan Richman
The Hold Steady

Mainly this made me think of all the bands I WISH I would have had the opportunity to see. Off the top of my head, in order:

Velvet Underground
The Louvin Brothers
Johnny Cash
The Darkness
Dead Kennedys
Talking Heads
Lifter Puller
Soul Coughing
The Doug Anthony All-Stars
The Flying Burrito Brothers
The Bee-Gees (Pre-Disco)

It hurts me that I have to ask this instead of take it as a forgone conclusion, but does anyone want to go see the metal Bee Gees cover band with me? And if not, what am I doing with my life that I have no friends who do want to go to this? An existential crisis!

I have been using Pandora unlike most people. I usually am interested in listening to music by a specific person, so Pandora hasn’t been all that useful for me. But I realized the number of stations I had were getting out of control and so I consolidated. My new channels are:

New Pop Country (Toby Keith! Brad Paisley! Big and Rich! Kenny Chesney!)– Basically Country Hell

Indie Sad Bastards (Stephen Merritt projects, Jens Lekman)

B96 and Dance (Things I like that might be played on Chicago’s B96, bad house music, R Kelly)

Alt-Country Rock (Drive-By Truckers, Wilco, Hank III, Robbie Fulks, Gram Parsons etc)– Country for hipsters

Canonical Sad Bastard (Leonard Cohen, Lou Reed, Warren Zevon)–Kurt and I have basically invented a genre called “Sad Bastard.” It’s what that depressed, low self-esteem drunk sensitive guy you dated (or were) in college listened to.

Anthem Rock/Metal (Queen, The Darkness, Andrew WK) aka Angry Bastard
Ambiguously Gay 1980s (Morrissey, the Cure, Brian Eno, The Smiths, George Michael, Erasure)–aka Gay New Wave Sad Bastard
Funny Instruments (TMBG, Twink, One Ring Zero, Michael Hearst, Tom Waits)  Nerd Bastard
Old Tymey Country (Louvin Brothers, Johnny Cash, Hank Williams I, Buck Owens, Dwight Yoakam)  Outlaw Sad Bastard

Last night I finally went to my first NYC Opry show (the only opry where you’ll see someone in a Kucinich tshirt and a cowboy hat), which I enjoyed quite a lot. I recently reread the Chuck Klosterman piece on how hipsters who say they like only like old country are poseur scum. His reasoning being that old country spoke to the people that listened to it in the same way that new pop country speaks to the people who listen to it, so when alt-country bands sing about ranches and guns and whiskey, they sing about some culture they haven’t experienced to an audience who also knows little about it.

This has always grated on me, since I like old country, altcountry, AND pop country (which I would like to now refer to as nu cuntry). And I am 100% cityfolk. Like, seriously the country life only holds terror for me (c.f. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre).
But last night I realized two things. The more broadly applicable being that I think we’ve passed the altcountry phase where people sing about old country themes. Case in point, this amazing song about Ira Glass which mentions librarians. Seriously, is there a song of any genre I could relate to more than one about Ira Glass? Last night I also saw country renditions of “Take it on the Run” by REO Speedwagon and “Home Sweet Home” by Motley Crue. I would be hard pressed to say either of those straight pop songs speak to me and my situation as much as a song about Ira.

The more specifically applicable point is about why *I* like country music.  My friend, and pop country partner in crime Mary pointed out long ago how most city/suburb kids aren’t into the country music enough to like cheesy pop country.  And I haven’t really figured that out.  But then listening last night I realized that most country has these themes:

• guns
• religion/sin/jesus
• caddies
• drinking to excess/alcoholics

All of these things featured prominently in my childhood, what with the catholic schooling, german mom, and italian dad.  It makes total sense why I like country now!  And my upbringing did involve one horse, namely one my dad punched in the face.  And the only thing my dad ever taught me to draw (yes I realize the cliche NOW, but this is completely the truth) was a horse head.

In my old age (it is birthday month after all)* I have noticed I have begun to forget things.  Having an autistic in the family, my family members and I genetically have pretty good, yet odd memory.  Finding physical objects has been my ability, which is helpful since I have been an utter slob my entire life.  However, I can find my keys in that mess.  Well, not as much anymore.

However most of these memory losses have occurred in a happy way.  Past Me does something which makes Future Me  (or Current Me, depending on your (my) perspective) incredibly happy.  Past Me put all these albums by Jens Lekman on my Amazon wishlist.  Current Me has no idea why, but decided to take a chance.  Way to go, Past Me, you know just the albums I would like!

Today I found a pair of jeans in my closet.  I do not recall seeing these jeans….ever.  They are black and I generally don’t BUY black jeans (I think I have owned one pair).  They are also rolled up, in a way I never do, and creased as if I always wear them this way.  And they are much too long for me.  But they fit me perfectly in other respects, so I cut off the bottoms.   Thanks for the jeans, Past Me!  Also they are very very low rise, so I would assume I would have remembered buying pants where my ass comes out.  Apparently Past Me doesn’t remember to cover her ass.
Oddly, while writing this, Jens Lekman came on my iTunes shuffle.  Now Past Me is freaking me out.

*No worries.  I am not one of those “I am SO OLD” twentysomethings.  I am not worried about age at this time.

This may be the cutest thing ever.

I met Stephin Merritt.  and oddly, his mom.

He made fun of people who use his songs in their weddings.  He was kind of merciless about it, actually.  Which I guess is how I should expect him to be.

Merritt and Lemony Snicket is like Quentin Tarantino and horror movie.  It makes me question if the entertainment world aligned just for me.

I just bought this:

you love my gruesome finger wound!

so new york has officially scarred me. Enjoy my metal face.

This week was crazy musical adventure week.  I saw Evil Dead: The Musical! which was excellent, and One Ring Zero, who I have loved for a while. They had a pink accordion that it took all of my willpower not to touch. I also saw some experimental percussion by So Percussion. I went with a friend who wanted to go and I would say about half was a little too experimental/John Cagey for me, but happily they played half the show with Matmos, who make funny sounds with goofy equiptment, including roses as drumsticks and chimes hitting dry ice–that was awesome. Also, Matmos has the distinct advantage of being easy on the eyes, at least to me:

And they wear suits!

I think this experimental stuff with funny instruments is more fun to watch than listen to, and although I don’t know that I would “rock out” to their music at home, watching them was interesting.

Speaking of metal, although I am misquoted on their website, I have been listening to a lot of Chicago Radio 1.  They have a metal show, a random good music show, and a variety show with lots of football talk on it by my friend Chris.  They are having a show where listeners send in mp3s stripped of metadata and they will play the songs blind.  I like this idea.

as you probably have heard, cbgb is closing next weekend.  one of my primary objectives when moving here was to visit before they closed, as most of my favoritest bands ever started there.  i got on the job early but then forgot about it only to realize i was running out of time!

but as a friend from out of town is visiting next weekend, we excitingly got tix the night before cbgb closes for the dictators and acoustic blondie set.  yay!

15 year old jenny is very excited.  and 27 year old jenny feels 30 dollar concerts are not punk rock, but she attends them anyway.

Thursday night I certified that a new member would take up residence in the rockstars I am in love with pantheon of idols. First a recap.

My sister likes to remind me that the first person in this list has to be Michael Jackson (48).

I stand by this. He was an attractive 80s dude. I insisted we would get married, which would make me Ms. Jackson, if you’re nasty.
There was a brief interest in Joe and Donnie from NKOTB. I stand by Donnie. He’s a Wahlberg! He ain’t a bad looker, though a little too Mickey Rourke for my tastes:

Joey (34), though now religious, ain’t bad either, though I would say neither new kid is exactly my “type” at this point:

When I was twelve or so, I was the only human on earth to watch David Bowie’s “The Linguini Incident.” I have always been a big magic fan, so I was in love with David (49). This would also be my Rolling Stones Period, thus it fit in well:

I stand by this attraction as David just gets hotter, and better dressed.

Also around this period (1990ish) I became obsessed with Urge Overkill. Nash Kato (left), my friend, is another well dressed man:

I also was sort of in love with Blackie, the drummer, but he left the band. I always wondered if they still played song like (Today Is)Blackie’s Birthday after he left….

I never got to see UO in their heyday, as I was well under the age limit for any club they might play. I did get to see them about a year ago in Champaign and I was totally fangirl about it. It was ridiculous. I own and love Nash’s solo album.

Then there was the more metal-y period. I just had no attraction to James Hetfield. It was a dark period for rockers I was in love with.

Then I fell for Hank (45).

Oh Henry. You’re angry and wear a lot of black. And now you’re all literary and stand-up comedy. You have lots to talk about. You hate the president but play USO shows. You’re principled. And no doubt you TOTALLY have issues. But it doesn’t matter. You often talk about how you stay home alone on Friday nights. I don’t know that I believe that, but it makes you hotter. I love you Henry. I will do your windows. I say that because I am clearly Henry’s soul mate, as he describes here.
In reality I HATE people with muscles. i find them totally gross. But not Henry. Oh sigh Henry. Even hotter in person.

Quite differently, I am also devotedly in love with Prince, and he is funky:

Also, quite the dresser. Apparently, the way to my heart is a suit. I really am my father’s daughter I guess. If you don’t get why Prince is hot, then clearly you have never heard a Prince song. I saw Prince in concert and was almost taken with the vapors.

This has all been leading up to the new person who I believe is entering the pantheon. I considered it last time I saw him in concert, but have now decided after seeing him again he does belong here:

Ladies and Gentlemen, the new challenger, Mike Cooley of the Drive-By Truckers

here’s an example of his music.

I mean, if your band insists on at least THREE guitarists (excluding bassist) and usually four guitarists per song, you know something’s going right. Plus he sings all the kinda warped first person songs, which he writes, and generally seem to be biographical. Case in point:

” You say you’re tired of me taking you for granted
Waiting’ up till the last minute to call you up and see what you want to do
Well you’re only fifteen, girl, you ain’t got no secretary
And “for granted” is a mighty big word for a country girl like you”
I once discussed with some friends the “Mickey Rourke factor” of attraction–being attracted to males who are bad/bad for you. I made the distinction that I have always liked James Spader better. You see all matters of love are explainable by 1980s movie villians. While Mickey Rourke may rough you up and drink too much, degrade you, the James Spader type will mentally make YOU degrade yourself. I see that aspect a lot in these lyrics and find it somewhat humorous. But apparently also hot. So perhaps Henry is not too fucked up for me after all….

You really have not celebrated if you haven’t heard pirate versions of “Fight for Your Right (to Party)” (Fight for Your Right to Plunder) and “Why Don’t We Do It in the Road?” (”Why Don’t We Do It in the Hold?”) played on an accordion.